I recently had a discussion with my friend. She stated her belief that when it comes to pregnancy, there are no accidents when sex is consensual. I can’t argue with her on that. I do however believe that if a woman unexpectedly becomes pregnant and the pregnancy is unwanted the woman will naturally want to talk to someone. Society may say well, it’s her fault, she should not have had unprotected sex, and deal with the consequences. In my opinion that is harsh. Now, I love my friend and we don’t agree on everything. I listened to her thoughts and I did not really give my opinion. I have had conversations with people who disagree with my thoughts and beliefs and I have been verbally attacked for my opinion. I don’t feel it is my place to convince someone their opinion is incorrect. People are entitled to their beliefs. I respect my friend and after careful consideration, here is my opinion on pregnancy and other unexpected events in life…
Everyone makes mistakes. I am not a believer that if someone is obese and that person eats McDonalds all day every day that McDonalds is to blame. If that person finds out they have high cholesterol, or high blood pressure or diabetes, that person will be shocked, scared and will want to turn to someone to talk to. Is that an accident? No. Is that person responsible for what they eat? Yes. Do they have a right to be upset and want to talk to someone? Absolutely. Society may say, it’s their fault they are obese and have health problems, but that does not mean society or friends should turn their backs on them.
Oftentimes people need help overcoming something. Addictions to drugs, alcohol, sex, food, the list goes on forever. People find themselves in situations they could have prevented, but people are weak and impulsive. A spouse cheats on a spouse and the spouse finds out and they separate. That is no accident; the event could have been prevented. I would feel sympathy for the family, including the cheating spouse.
Every day people die from texting while driving. Those people know better than that. Those are not accidents. Those are tragic events that could have been prevented, but people will naturally mourn the loss of a loved one.
I always say I have done some fucked up things in my life and I am ultimately responsible. During those dark times I wish I had someone to talk to, someone who did not judge me. I wish I had someone who would be there to help me get through. I can’t call my fuck ups accidents. I knew I should have been more careful, but we all have a lapse in judgment. I always knew I had to face my consequences, but it does feel good to face consequences with support.
The point of this is to agree when it comes to many occurrences in life where something happens unexpectedly that could have been prevented but was not, it should not be called an accident. However, in dealing with consequences it’s good to have someone to rely on to help people get through. It’s something I wish I had through my earlier years. I guess that’s why therapists exist…
Over and out