Bias

Recently I read my daughter an explanation on bias and stereotyping. I gave my daughters examples of stereotyping and bias and explained to her that just because a person is black does not mean they live in the ghetto or because a person is Asian does not automatically mean that person is smart.

The paragraph I read to my daughter stated not all stereotypes are bad, but still there are stereotypes nonetheless. The example the text used was a boy does well in math because boys do well in math. I never really thought about “good” stereotypes.

One point the text stated was when communicating ideas make sure ideas are based on fact and not opinion or bias. I just had a conversation with a good friend about a problem she has with her boyfriend. The situation is very delicate. My friend loves her boyfriend very much, but he works a job with demanding hours, he does not have a car, he lives with his father, and his hygiene is not the best. My friend and I have had discussion after discussion on how she should address these issues with her boyfriend. Yes, she does love him, but she is not attracted to him because of certain hygiene and other issues. No one wants to hear they stink, or their breath stinks, or their ears are dirty and it’s a turn off! It’s a hard conversation to have! But, the conversation can be had based on fact! She can carefully say, please get a haircut, it really turns me on when you are groomed, or it looks like you have some wax build up. She not say get your fucking haircut, it’s fucking disgusting. She should say, I’d like it if you could work on getting your own car, not it’s ridiculous you don’t have your own car.

When conversations are based on fact and bias, prejudice or opinions are removed, the conversation though it may be tough will be harder for a person to digest. Most of us walk around not trying to hurt another person’s feelings. I know I don’t. Tact is necessary to spare feelings. I am glad I was able to read that to my daughter and I was glad to have the conversation with my friend. I also feel I need to do better communicating with people using less opinion, bias, or prejudice and base my thoughts on fact. Great lesson learned!

Over and out 🙂

Home School Wk 3

Am I smarter than an 8^th grader? I am not sure. This week was better than last week. Through this home school process I know I will see many ups and downs and we, my daughter and I, will experience many frustrations. I think she did a good job this week and I see that she is trying. My daughter is a complex person as we are all complex. As part of this process I must continue to express to her that she is the way she is and that is how she is meant to be. I don’t expect her to be like me because she is not me. Her father I believe has fallen into the trap of comparing himself as a kid to her as a kid. He liked to play sports so he thinks she should like to play sports. I do not bad mouth him but I do tell my daughter it’s ok if she does not like to play sports. As a child I loved to read and loved putting puzzles together. My daughter does not like to read or like to put puzzles together. That is ok with me.

This week we studied scientific notation in math. At first she had trouble but after taking a step back she got it. I learned my daughter forgot fractions. I explained her that some math has to be remembered. So, I had to go back to some of the basics. I taught my daughter the beauty of Excel, at least the adding function. So much better than a calculator. I introduced her to taking notes. Note taking is so important in teaching and learning. I am encouraging her to broaden her thinking. I do not accept answers like “I like The Hunger Games because it was good.” I am developing her thought to give me more specific reasons why. I will say it’s like pulling teeth out of my head without any pain meds! In history we learned about President Jackson. In the beginning of the chapter Jackson seemed like a President for the people. People related to Jackson. Then we learned about the treatment of the Indians. Jackson did not look so great after his refusal to stand up for the Indians. I guess at the time people in their thought of just taking over someone’s land was right may have made Jackson popular. I asked my daughter how she would feel if someone just came and took over her room. She said she would not think it’s a big deal, but that is a smart ass 13 year old answer!  It’s so crazy that the problems in history affect the people of today like recession, the economy and inflation.

So, am I smarter than an 8^th grader? When it comes to book smarts probably not. For, once we complete scientific notation and learning about history, I will probably forget these concepts again. I will say I am having fun learning and teaching my daughter. Sometimes I think she hates me because we keep on practicing until she is a master. When it comes to real world experience yes I am smarter than an 8^th grader, but with my help she may catch up to me soon. That’s a good thing!

Over and out 🙂